Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Road Block

On the turning away
From the pale and downtrodden
And the words they say
Which we won't understand

"Don't accept that what's happening
Is just a case of others' suffering
Or you'll find that you're joining in
The turning away"

It's a sin that somehow
Light is changing to shadow
And casting it's shroud
Over all we have known

Unaware how the ranks have grown
Driven on by a heart of stone
We could find that we're all alone
In the dream of the proud

On the wings of the night
As the daytime is stirring
Where the speechless unite
In a silent accord

Using words you will find are strange
And mesmerized as they light the flame
Feel the new wind of change
On the wings of the night

No more turning away
From the weak and the weary
No more turning away
From the coldness inside

Just a world that we all must share
It's not enough just to stand and stare
Is it only a dream that there'll be
No more turning away?

--David Gilmour, Anthony Moore


I haven’t written for a couple of weeks. And I have to make a confession.

I have hit a wall.

It’s not that I haven’t wanted to write. I have. But I’ve felt like I’ve had nothing to say. That bothers me. But I think what bothers me more is that I have been afraid to write.

I think that concerns me more than not actually doing anything. Because that worries me, it makes it harder for me to want to put anything down.

Even just writing this has been difficult because I don’t quite know how to express where my head is. What bothers me even more than not writing or being hesitant about writing is that I have never experienced anything like this before. I’m not sure how to deal with that. But I’m going to try.

Imagine that. Me: speechless. I’m sure there are people I know who laugh at the thought mainly because I almost always have something to say. This doesn’t mean that what I say is relevant or important; most of the time it is neither. But once in a while something grabs me and simply won’t let go.

I had a conversation with an acquaintance of mine recently. An individual that has been to places that I likely will never see. Because of that, I feel the need to protect her identity. She shared a story with me about a journey she went on a number of years ago when she was a young medical student. She’d spent some time with Doctors Without Borders in a couple of different African countries. The abject poverty that she was exposed to, in addition to the social conditions and the political situations she saw were at the same time both heart-wrenching and frightening. So much so, in fact, that I had a very difficult time hearing the stories she was telling me.

One of the countries she’d been to was Sudan. With everything I’d heard about what was going on there, it was sobering to have her tell me that what has been reported doesn’t even scratch the surface of what is really happening. The scope of the violence was in itself massive; large numbers of people being forcibly displaced, others being killed, mostly in what is known as the Darfur region. Even today there is fighting over oil rights and talk of imposing Islamic (Sharia) Law on the entire country. A country where at least half of the population is non-Arab and non-Muslim.

To say the least, this is a really, truly sad situation.




Anonymous said...

Don’t be so hard on yourself sir! Even professional writers suffer from a lack of motivation or writes block from time to time. It may also be that you have been so busy with school, work and all the other things you do that your brain it telling you to relax for a bit. Keep in mind that writing is hard work and with all the other academic demands on you it may be your brain’s way of letting you know that its time to “chill” for a while. While I enjoy reading your varied and always informative blog, I understand why it may be difficult at times to keep up with it. So go easy on yourself and when the thoughts flow easily again then you will know its time to resume writing and it will be with easy that it happens.

Anonymous said...

Hello, My name is Tammy. I am a 52 year old career Paramedic and Paramedic Instructor who was put out on Disability in 2009. I live with my 22 year old son. We live in North Carolina. I write this in the hopes of getting help from kind, more fortunate people. I spent 20 years helping and teaching people as a Paramedic before I had to go out on Disability. I make $933.00 a month on Disability. My rent takes over half that. My electricity takes another $250.00. I make 'too much' to get Medicaid, so I have Medicare which still costs a lot for Doctor's visits and Medications....and I am on a lot. I am not eligible for food stamps because I make 'too much'. I have exhausted every avenue available to me and cannot find help anywhere. My son is desperately searching for a job, which is all we would need to make it, but has had no luck. No one is hiring. He has applied for work everywhere in our city, nearby cities, and online. It's just impossible in this economy to find a job.
I am asking for ANY donations anyone could make. I am trying to get enough money to pay my rent up a few months in advance so that we can eat and get my medications until my son can find employment. Any amount that anyone can make would be a blessing and greatly appreciated!! I am not used to asking strangers for help, and this is very hard for me to do, but I am desperate. I have no family that can help me financially, and the Government will do nothing for me beyond my Disability check...which I worked very hard for all my life.

Please, please help me if you can...any amount will help.

Please mail any donation to:

Tammy Peaden

2509 Charles Blvd., Apt. 72

Greenville, NC


Thank you for taking the time to read this. Please pass this along to anyone that might want to help me...Thank you!

TOTWTYTR said...

I was told by a friend of mine who was a professional author that the best way to get through writer's block is to write. It doesn't matter what you write, as long as you do it frequently.

As to your doctor friend. I know a doctor just like her, maybe it's even her. Very compassionate, has travelled all over the world to bring health care to people who have none. I admire her greatly, although sometimes I do question her sanity.

Darfur is a mess and holding vigils and protests will do nothing to solve the problem. It's a shame, but there is no nation that is willing to help the poor people of Darfur and their government has stripped them of the tools of self defense.