My wife is a Psychiatric nurse who also has ED/Critical Care credentials. Being the twisted person that I am, I have to admit that what she shared with me is pretty wild. However, it is hysterically funny. It's been around the Web in the past, and I'm sure it's made its way into the mailboxes of some of you out there. Hopefully it won't be too offensive.....
Christmas carols for the psychologically challenged
1. Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Queens Disoriented Are
3. Amnesia - I Don't Know If I'll Be Home For Christmas
4. Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic - Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and.....
6. Paranoid - Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder - Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Full Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells....
10. Agoraphobia - I Heard The Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
11. Senile Dementia - Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe
12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder - I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down The House
13. Social Anxiety disorder - Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate
Everyone needs a good laugh now and again.
I don't know if I'll be available to write over the next 2 days or so. If I am, I will. Otherwise, have a Merry Christmas. And be safe.
"Now there were shepherds in that region living in the fields and keeping the night watch over their flock. The angel of the Lord appeared to them and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were struck with great fear. The angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid; for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For today in the city of David a savior has been born for you who is Messiah and Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.' And suddenly there was a multitude of the heavenly host with the angel, praising God and saying:
'Glory to God in the highest
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.' "
--Luke 2:8-14 (NAB)